But not Jiah whose letter spells out "the pain of heartbreak when the person you love wants to abuse you or threatens to hit you or cheats on you telling other girls they are beautiful or throws you out of their house when you have no where to go and you've come to them out of love or when they lie to your face or they make you chase after them in their car." Dating Suraj Pancholi was an exercise in humiliation, but Jiah mistook her pain as the seal of authenticity: masochism as an affirmation of the strength of her love. We all fall for the wrong guy/girl at some point in our life - some more wrong than others - but most of us find a way to fall right out. She could not stand lies." But here's the question Rabia never asks herself: Why did her daughter throw away her life merely because, in Rabia's words, "she fell for the wrong guy"? What did Rabia teach her - or fail to do so - that she would do so? She was fine, she was sincere, pure and not manipulative at all.
Certainly not her mother who offers up heartbreak as vindication of her daughter's mental state: "Reports that my daughter was depressed because of work is all rubbish.
"Aur bhi gham hain zamane mein mohabbat ke siwa/ Raahaten aur bhi hain vasl ki raahat ke siva," declared Faiz Ahmed Faiz. I did everything for you," wrote Jiah mistaking an abusive relationship for the meaning of life. Women who live to love as opposed to love to live are doomed to unhappiness. And greater a young girl's need for grand passion, the more likely she is to attract a parade of Mr Wrongs who exploit that yearning. "You may not have known this but you affected me deeply to a point where I lost myself in loving you," writes Jiah, describing a relationship where she was ready to sacrifice all - her body, career and self-respect - to win and keep Pancholi's affections. Romance is perhaps the most dangerous delusion, especially for young girls who are raised on a steady diet of fairytales, Bollywood movies and romance novels that valourise the all-consuming love affair, teach girls to hold out for Mr Right, wait for their "one true love."īut in real life, Prince Charming often turns out to be the villain, or at least a uncommitted cad. Rabia Amin's given a blizzard of interviews expressing her grief and blaming first Bollywood and now her boyfriend for Jiah's death. It can be easily read as a primer of what not to teach your little girl. The suicide note reveals a young woman who was desperate for love and approval, seeking it in all the wrong places with all the wrong men and for all the wrong reasons. Her dangerously muddled notions about life, love and career are unexceptional except for the unhappy destiny they led her towards. Jiah's rambling letter is more tragic because it contains little that is surprising. However the truth is that it happened only because of the trauma and the abuse she suffered at the hands of Suraj Pancholi and his father Aditya Pancholi," wrote Amin on a social media site where she posted a scanned copy of Jiah's suicide note. "Some sections of the media and some film industry people are speculating that my daughter Jiah committed suicide because of depression related to her career. Jiah Khan's mother has been on a crusade ever since her daughter committed suicide.
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